Wednesday, May 11, 2011

"Lazzari's Sports Roundup" - - - - 5/14/11

O.K., you asked for it (well--at least SOME of you)--more of the "athletic matches" that have appeared in this column over the years.........

Can you imagine if former Central CT State University basketball player Denee Burgess had once married former NFL quarterback/TV commentator "Dandy" Don Meredith? Fans of the "Penguin" character on the old "Batman" television show would have delighted in her full married name of Denee Burgess Meredith..........If former women's tennis player Ai Sugiyama ever married ex-big league outfielder Jermaine Dye, divorced, married former outfielder Steve Brye--divorced again--then married ex-NBA player Johnny High, she'd be known as Ai Dye Brye High..........Former collegiate golfer Ashley Warsaw marries ex-NFL lineman Bubba Paris, divorces, marries sports talk show host Jim Rome--divorces again--then marries former University of Miami QB Brock Berlin. She'd be roaming the links with the European-themed name of Ashley Warsaw Paris Rome Berlin..........If ex-Trinity College women's hockey player Emma Handy ever tied the knot with former NFL lineman Charles Mann, fans of old James Taylor tunes would enjoy seeing the bride sporting the new married name of Emma Handy Mann..........Can you imagine if former Villanova women's basketball player Maria Getty married ex-big league pitcher Chris Eddy, divorced, married ex-Southern CT State University SID Rick Leddy--divorced again--then married NASCAR driver Kyle Petty? She'd be known as Maria Getty Eddy Leddy Petty..........Ex-Louisville women's basketball player Jazz Covington marries comedian Chris Rock, divorces, marries former big league pitcher Pat Rapp--divorces again--then marries PGA golfer Fred Funk. Music lovers of all genres everywhere would surely delight in her full married name of Jazz Rock Rapp Funk..........Former UCONN women's basketball player Kalana Greene marries Michael Redd of the Milwaukee Bucks, divorces, marries former USC running back Charles White--divorces again--then marries NBA player Kwame Brown. She'd then be known by the colorful, full married name of Kalana Greene Redd White Brown..........If LPGA golfer Sarah Lynn Sargent ever tied the knot with former NFL wide receiver Webster Slaughter, wrestling aficionados throughout the land would surely enjoy her full married name of Sarah Lynn Sargent Slaughter..........If LPGA golfer Ji Young Oh ever tied the knot with PGA golfer/CT's own J.J. Henry, candy lovers would enjoy her strolling the fairways with the full name of Ji Young Oh Henry.........Picture this: If former LPGA golfer Carol Mann had once married ex-baseball manager Stump Merrill, divorced, married former college football coach Jackie Sherrill--divorced again--then married current MLB manager John Farrell, she would have been walking golf courses with the catchy name of Carol Merrill Sherrill Farrell..........I'd like to see former Penn St. basketball coach Renee Portland hook up with MLB pitcher John Maine. If they ever tied the knot, residents of the Pine Tree State would surely delight in her married name of Renee Portland Maine..........If LPGA golfer Young Jo married former NFL offensive lineman Duval Love, fans of country singer Sonny James would surely enjoy her strolling the links with the married name of Young Love..........If LPGA golfer Candie Kung married former NFL defensive lineman Charles Mann, fans of former MLB pitcher John Candelaria would surely delight in her married name of Candie Mann..........Scenario: The LPGA's Sally Little marries fellow pro golfer Rod Spittle, divorces, marries former big league OF/DH Ron Kittle--divorces again--then marries former MLB pitcher Rocky Biddle. She'd then be gracing the fairways with the catchy, married name of Sally Little Spittle Kittle Biddle..........I'd like to see LPGA golfer Nancy Scranton hook up with Champions Tour golfer Jim Chancey--for no other reason than if the two were to marry, she'd be teeing off with the catchy, married name of Nancy Chancey...........Finally, can you imagine if WNBA'er K.B. Sharp married PGA golfer D.A. Points, divorced, married columnist George Will--divorced again--then married former Lafayette College running back Jonathan Hurt? Those afraid of needles would surely have no problem warning others while saying her full, married name of K.B. Sharp Points Will Hurt.

Even more archived "matches" to come soon, folks..........


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