"Lazzari's Sports Roundup" ---- 08-05-06

If I'm writing sports headlines........

*former NBA star Charles Barkley eyeing a run for governor of Alabama: CHARLES IN CHARGE?

*first-round pick A.J. Hawk signs with the Green Bay Packers:
A 'HAWK' OF A SIGNING

*Karrie Webb wins the Evian Masters: WEBB MASTER

*tennis player Gustavo Kuerten to miss U.S. Open due to injury:
NO 'KUERTEN' CALL FOR GUSTAVO

*back-to-back ineffective outings by Roger Clemens:
CLEMENS’ LEMONS

*former goalie Garth Snow becomes N.Y. Islanders GM:
SNOW IN ISLANDERS' FORECAST

*golfer Corey Pavin wins the U.S. Bank Championship in Wisconsin: PAVIN' THE WAY IN MILWAUKEE

*Barry Bonds' continued surliness toward the media:
TACT-FREE BONDS

*Michelle Wie loses by one stroke to Karrie Webb at the Evian Masters: MICHELLE COMES UP A 'WIE' BIT SHORT

*Harold Reynolds dismissed from ESPN amid sex harassment charges: REYNOLDS RAP

*Tour de France winner Floyd Landis tests high for testosterone: LANDIS-GRACE

*Buffalo Bills LB Jeff Posey gets a $450,000 raise for 2006:
FINANCIAL FUTURE LOOKING ROSY FOR POSEY

*Bruce Sutter inducted into Cooperstown:
WELL-'SUTTER-ED' FOR HALL

*Cubs P Mark Prior's desire to return fully from injuries:
PRIOR COMMITMENT

*Travis Hafner of Cleveland left off AL All-Star squad: TRAVIS-TY

*Raiders WR Randy Moss opens a fruit smoothie store in West Virginia: NEW BUSINESS GETS RANDY'S JUICES FLOWING

*N.Y. Giants sign RB Little John Flowers:
FLOWERS HOPING TO BLOOM IN NEW YORK

*Chiefs lineman Willie Roaf's decision to retire and return to school: ROAF LOOKING TO HIT BOOKS NOW--NOT OPPOSING LINEMEN

*Reliever Bob Wickman joins the Braves:
ATLANTA HOPING ‘WICK’ CATCHES FIRE

*Golfing legend Arnold Palmer earns $25 million through various business interests in 2005: ARNIE'S FINANCES SURELY NOT IN THE ROUGH

*Golfer Greg Norman accumulating $20 million in off-course earnings in 2005: THIS 'SHARK' NOT FEELING 'BITE' OF RECESSION AT ALL

*A professional team with good chemistry: SMELLS LIKE 'TEAM' SPIRIT

*Dale Earnhardt Jr. wins a NASCAR race: JUNIOR ACHIEVEMENT

*Estonia's Margo Uusorg--clutching his wife Sandra--wins the World Wife-Carrying Championships in a time of 56.9 seconds: UUSORG CARRIES HIS WEIGHT--AND THEN SOME

*N.Y. Giants coach Tom Coughlin's plans to improve his team: 'COUGH' MEDICINE

*UCONN guard/computer thief Marcus Williams signs multi-million dollar contract with Nets: LAP(TOP) OF LUXURY

*NASCAR driver Kurt Busch marries Eva Bryan--an employee of Kurt Busch, Inc.: ALL IN THE FAMILY

*N.Y. Met David Wright gets game-winning hit:
DAVID 'WRIGHTS' THE SHIP

*Impressive fastball possessed by Florida Marlins rookie reliever Taylor Tankersley: LOTS OF GAS IN THIS 'TANK'

*Yanks P Mariano Rivera earns 400th save:
MARIANO EARNS #400; 'MO' TO COME

Bob Lazzari

Reprinted by permission of the Valley Times.